In retrospect, Yoongi wasn't sure what made him start getting into it.
They had moved to the States, not that he wanted to. He missed speaking the native language - his English was improving, but at a much slower rate than, say, his younger brothers' was, which was frustrating - he missed the easy ability to blend in - everyone had been Korean in Korea, not here - he missed his friends, the music scene, the familiar places and any kind of retreat. And he felt as if he was drowning in feelings that made it hard to breathe, although he knew that had been true before too. It had just been a little easier to distract himself.
He didn't really get to play basketball here, having no friends and being short and Korean didn't lend itself to get into it, unless he wanted to draw a lot of attention, which he didn't. He didn't know anyone in the rap scene either, if there even was one. Asking random guys in his strongly accented English was not something he felt like doing and while he had tried some internet searches, it wasn't as if his mother would let him out by himself for any other reason than school, since she basically thought that America was the devil's playground.
It meant that Yoongi was trapped inside the house most of the day, but it also meant that they did have a house. There was a basement and, after some arguing, he ended up with his bedroom there. It was somewhere to hide and it wasn't as if he'd ever been that fond of the sun. He had to fix things up a little, but he didn't mind working with his hands. It was for Namjoon's sake that he recorded something again finally, after a long time that he had feelings in his heart and thoughts in his head but no way of expressing them in any other way than screaming into pillows and crying curled up in bed late at night. Recording was easy enough, but then it got copyright claimed by YouTube for one sample that he'd used and it annoyed him out of trying again for a while. One night though, he ended up streaming instead, once more convinced by Namjoon, and that was the most productive time he had had since getting here.
Of course, Namjoon led a busy life and he didn't have much time, while Yoongi felt he had nothing but time - probably because he barely slept. So he kept streaming, even with no one to watch. Only people started watching, a handful at first, people he knew back in Korea, a couple others, one time a girl decided that he looked like an idol and a screenshot made its way into that fandom, resulting in a rapid increase in viewership. It continued from there, steady upwards trend. Yoongi wasn't sure what to make of it, so he just kept doing his thing.
Usually his thing was to produce a song and talk about it as he did so, answering some of the questions in the chat. Sometimes he rapped and, when he really felt it, he let viewers challenge him to a rap battle. Something that had started mainly with Namjoon, when they won decided by viewer votes and the results tended to be 50/50, but now it was often just random viewers, with generally middling results and easily won battles. It wasn't like the underground scene, but it was something. Yoongi changed his name from Gloss to Agust D, because the former sounded stupid now that his English was better and because he missed Daegu and everything there.
He wasn't quite out of that spiral of depression yet, so sometimes he couldn't force himself to be creative. Instead he would just do the things parts of his audience wanted him to do, like try out face masks and do mukbang, which seemed like an especially stupid concept, so he was pretty sure he did the worst mukbang possible, but his fans - it was weird to think of himself as having those, but the viewer count was climbing and what else could he call them - seemed to enjoy it. Whatever they enjoyed about his personality, he didn't get it. Maybe it was more fun to watch than it was to live with it.
Still, streaming did give him something. A routine, an outlet, something to focus energy on, even on days when he felt as if he didn't have any.
He did it that day, same as any day, playing a track he'd produced years ago as he read the chat, randomly replying to some people. "No, sweet_kristy, not bored. Just tired."
With a shrug, he shook his head. "I'm not going to bed yet. It's not that kind of tired anyway."
Why had this chat started to sound like his mother? "What is everyone up to? You're studying, radiophobia? Ah. You should turn this off and focus, I'm not required viewing." He hummed, watching the screen as the chat scrolled by. "Working out? Sounds tedious, music_viking. Cool name, by the way."
"Battle? Huh." Yoongi wasn't really feeling it, but since tonight was turning out to be a night where he had yet to feel anything, maybe that wasn't a good enough argument against it. He adjusted his headphones and leaned back in his chair, to check whether he'd closed the door properly. Everyone should be asleep, but he didn't want his mother to walk in suddenly. Or Kangwoo. Both had happened before.
Everything was set. He just wasn't sure whether he was ready. "KingSolitude... What, are you lonely?"
He muttered the words more than anything, while he set things up. "You have a cam? It's fine if you don't, as long as audio works."
His fighting spirit wasn't really showing yet, but that wasn't saying much. Usually didn't come out until he was at it. "Reminder for everyone, no slurs in chat or you'll be banned. And anyone who can't take an L won't ever be a winner."
Kingsolitude: I'm not lonely now, baby I got a cam, lemme in š
As soon as he had the invitation, he wasted no time taking it. He turned his camera on and smiled at AgustD, tipping his hat towards him. Yes, his hat. His very sparkly cowboy hat. Well, he was a Georgia boy - what self respecting Georgia boy wouldn't have his cowboy hat ready for a showdown like this. "Hello, handsome. Greetings from Atlanta, Georgia!"
His backdrop gave little away about his home, Kingsolitude was behind a black wall with red string lights and nothing much else - though he was very well lit. Oh yeah, he knew how to light himself. Had to make sure everyone saw how beautiful he was.
"Defending champ goes first, right? Rip me apart, baby. Don't hold back." He winked, clearly excited to be dissed.
Yoongi's mouth fell open, never good at hiding his surprise, much as he usually kept his expressions neutral. He also was not good at hiding when he thought someone was attractive, but luckily no one knew his tells for that, so that made it subtle enough, even as he swallowed, his eyes slightly widened. Why had someone who looked like that... What, didn't he have anything better to do? Like having his picture taken, maybe. He looked like a model.
"...don't call me baby." That was the first thing he could think to say, because he'd felt his cheeks heating up at that. And at the wink. And at everything. What was this? He frowned, biting his thumbnail as he started playing a beat and tried to get into a different mindset than just staring at this guy. What was he supposed to diss him over, being so beautiful and wasting his time with some no-name streamer's livestream? More of a self-diss, that. He mumbled some Korean curses under his breath, then finally just looked at the ground, focusing on his heartbeat matching the beat. His rap wasn't bad, when he got started, the days when he'd completely sink had luckily passed, but it wasn't exactly going to wow anyone either. Did not help that he could barely bring himself to look at the screen again, hard to fake confidence like that.
"You don't like my hat? Hurtful." He reached out and grabbed his chest, wounded by the diss but knowing that he was already winning this - he had flustered the pretty boy. So his gaydar was right - perfect. Honestly, that was a victory enough. He reached out and turned on his own beat - which had a very unique country vibe to it. The comment section went wild, not sure what to make of it. Especially when he got up and lined danced a little, just to get into the mood.
His rap was a lot smoother than Yoongi's and with a lot more swagger, picking at his clothing and his stream a little but he didn't like to kick a boy while he was down. Which is why the lyrics soon flipped, mid rap, from attack to flatter. Yes, he addressed it but hated could fight him.
It went from petty blows at his self esteem to Kingsolitude telling his opponent that he was a stunner and he could call him any time. "If Eve ain't in your garden, you know that you can call me when you want, call me when you need, call me in the morning. I'll be on the way."
"...my phone's broken," Yoongi quipped, leaning back and wishing he could turn the camera off. And the stream. Maybe never look at anything again and then eventually he'd forget that guy moving. Saying those things. He also wished his English was worse still, because then he'd not have understood the lyrics. Then they'd not keep repeating in his head. Ugh, he hated himself for knowing that he was going to go through this recording and analyse every bit of those lyrics.
"Time to vote, but it's pretty obvious... Sorry, people, I lost that one." He wasn't very broken up about it. He just wanted this to end. "You-- Er, I'll send you points or something, Lonely King." Or whatever his name had been. Hot guy. "Great job, keep fighting."
He did almost call him out for clearly not being personal with those lyrics - they had so not been about him - but whatever, he didn't want to prolong this. He needed to go splash cold water on his face.
my brothers are fighting so I'm stuck doing the dishes
did you know that my mother thinks there is too much danger of me dropping dishes to risk walking downstairs to where there's a dishwasher, so I need to use the tiny sink? I've never even dropped a dish
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They had moved to the States, not that he wanted to. He missed speaking the native language - his English was improving, but at a much slower rate than, say, his younger brothers' was, which was frustrating - he missed the easy ability to blend in - everyone had been Korean in Korea, not here - he missed his friends, the music scene, the familiar places and any kind of retreat. And he felt as if he was drowning in feelings that made it hard to breathe, although he knew that had been true before too. It had just been a little easier to distract himself.
He didn't really get to play basketball here, having no friends and being short and Korean didn't lend itself to get into it, unless he wanted to draw a lot of attention, which he didn't. He didn't know anyone in the rap scene either, if there even was one. Asking random guys in his strongly accented English was not something he felt like doing and while he had tried some internet searches, it wasn't as if his mother would let him out by himself for any other reason than school, since she basically thought that America was the devil's playground.
It meant that Yoongi was trapped inside the house most of the day, but it also meant that they did have a house. There was a basement and, after some arguing, he ended up with his bedroom there. It was somewhere to hide and it wasn't as if he'd ever been that fond of the sun. He had to fix things up a little, but he didn't mind working with his hands. It was for Namjoon's sake that he recorded something again finally, after a long time that he had feelings in his heart and thoughts in his head but no way of expressing them in any other way than screaming into pillows and crying curled up in bed late at night. Recording was easy enough, but then it got copyright claimed by YouTube for one sample that he'd used and it annoyed him out of trying again for a while. One night though, he ended up streaming instead, once more convinced by Namjoon, and that was the most productive time he had had since getting here.
Of course, Namjoon led a busy life and he didn't have much time, while Yoongi felt he had nothing but time - probably because he barely slept. So he kept streaming, even with no one to watch. Only people started watching, a handful at first, people he knew back in Korea, a couple others, one time a girl decided that he looked like an idol and a screenshot made its way into that fandom, resulting in a rapid increase in viewership. It continued from there, steady upwards trend. Yoongi wasn't sure what to make of it, so he just kept doing his thing.
Usually his thing was to produce a song and talk about it as he did so, answering some of the questions in the chat. Sometimes he rapped and, when he really felt it, he let viewers challenge him to a rap battle. Something that had started mainly with Namjoon, when they won decided by viewer votes and the results tended to be 50/50, but now it was often just random viewers, with generally middling results and easily won battles. It wasn't like the underground scene, but it was something. Yoongi changed his name from Gloss to Agust D, because the former sounded stupid now that his English was better and because he missed Daegu and everything there.
He wasn't quite out of that spiral of depression yet, so sometimes he couldn't force himself to be creative. Instead he would just do the things parts of his audience wanted him to do, like try out face masks and do mukbang, which seemed like an especially stupid concept, so he was pretty sure he did the worst mukbang possible, but his fans - it was weird to think of himself as having those, but the viewer count was climbing and what else could he call them - seemed to enjoy it. Whatever they enjoyed about his personality, he didn't get it. Maybe it was more fun to watch than it was to live with it.
Still, streaming did give him something. A routine, an outlet, something to focus energy on, even on days when he felt as if he didn't have any.
He did it that day, same as any day, playing a track he'd produced years ago as he read the chat, randomly replying to some people. "No, sweet_kristy, not bored. Just tired."
With a shrug, he shook his head. "I'm not going to bed yet. It's not that kind of tired anyway."
Why had this chat started to sound like his mother? "What is everyone up to? You're studying, radiophobia? Ah. You should turn this off and focus, I'm not required viewing." He hummed, watching the screen as the chat scrolled by. "Working out? Sounds tedious, music_viking. Cool name, by the way."
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Sleep is for the weak.
It's only 1am.
You feeling awake, AgustD???
We should rap battle šš
music_viking:
He'll destroy u
KingSolitude:
Oh baby~
you say it like it's a bad thing lol
sweet_kristy
ur gonna get owned so hard
show him, D š”
KingSolitude:
he can own me <3
But I'm gonna own him. Sorry, not sorry.
Big D, my man, battle me
Zerohero11
your so weird.
KingSolitude:
@ zerohero11 thx š„°š„°š„°
Rap battle me!!!
radiophobia
Why do you wanna lose so bad?
KingSolitude:
you should be studying @ radiophobia
TSK TSK
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Everything was set. He just wasn't sure whether he was ready. "KingSolitude... What, are you lonely?"
He muttered the words more than anything, while he set things up. "You have a cam? It's fine if you don't, as long as audio works."
His fighting spirit wasn't really showing yet, but that wasn't saying much. Usually didn't come out until he was at it. "Reminder for everyone, no slurs in chat or you'll be banned. And anyone who can't take an L won't ever be a winner."
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I'm not lonely now, baby
I got a cam, lemme in š
As soon as he had the invitation, he wasted no time taking it. He turned his camera on and smiled at AgustD, tipping his hat towards him. Yes, his hat. His very sparkly cowboy hat. Well, he was a Georgia boy - what self respecting Georgia boy wouldn't have his cowboy hat ready for a showdown like this. "Hello, handsome. Greetings from Atlanta, Georgia!"
His backdrop gave little away about his home, Kingsolitude was behind a black wall with red string lights and nothing much else - though he was very well lit. Oh yeah, he knew how to light himself. Had to make sure everyone saw how beautiful he was.
"Defending champ goes first, right? Rip me apart, baby. Don't hold back." He winked, clearly excited to be dissed.
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"...don't call me baby." That was the first thing he could think to say, because he'd felt his cheeks heating up at that. And at the wink. And at everything. What was this? He frowned, biting his thumbnail as he started playing a beat and tried to get into a different mindset than just staring at this guy. What was he supposed to diss him over, being so beautiful and wasting his time with some no-name streamer's livestream? More of a self-diss, that. He mumbled some Korean curses under his breath, then finally just looked at the ground, focusing on his heartbeat matching the beat. His rap wasn't bad, when he got started, the days when he'd completely sink had luckily passed, but it wasn't exactly going to wow anyone either. Did not help that he could barely bring himself to look at the screen again, hard to fake confidence like that.
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His rap was a lot smoother than Yoongi's and with a lot more swagger, picking at his clothing and his stream a little but he didn't like to kick a boy while he was down. Which is why the lyrics soon flipped, mid rap, from attack to flatter. Yes, he addressed it but hated could fight him.
It went from petty blows at his self esteem to Kingsolitude telling his opponent that he was a stunner and he could call him any time. "If Eve ain't in your garden, you know that you can call me when you want, call me when you need, call me in the morning. I'll be on the way."
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"Time to vote, but it's pretty obvious... Sorry, people, I lost that one." He wasn't very broken up about it. He just wanted this to end. "You-- Er, I'll send you points or something, Lonely King." Or whatever his name had been. Hot guy. "Great job, keep fighting."
He did almost call him out for clearly not being personal with those lyrics - they had so not been about him - but whatever, he didn't want to prolong this. He needed to go splash cold water on his face.
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to Cassiel
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:P
what's up?
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what's up with you?
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I found someone to collab with. Maybe. I'm gonna try
How about you?
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who did you find? you'll make them collab with you, you're good at that, who can say no to you?
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I want him.
... For music. I mean I ain't against other stuff but we need to perform together. I have that itch, you know? I need to scratch it or it'll wreck me!
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Love from Georgia, baby.
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I'm dis guy
remember???
your wet dream <3
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i use this phone around my family! >.<
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I'll send you my beautiful face only.
How's the fam, Chingu?
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did you know that my mother thinks there is too much danger of me dropping dishes to risk walking downstairs to where there's a dishwasher, so I need to use the tiny sink? I've never even dropped a dish
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to Cassiel
figured there'd be fanart...
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I ain't even mad that this message woke my lazy ass up.
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sry tho
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i stayed up late studying lol, i am motivated AF
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huh, must have texted the wrong number
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I have a subject I'm passionate on so I'm being a good boy. Stayed up all last night studying it.
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